Unwanted Facial Hair Removal Costs Woman Her Job


Who would have thought that losing their job could have such a positive effect on self-esteem? Certainly not Ivana C. Mychinagain, also known as, "The Bearded Lady". Up until last Tuesday, Ivana earned her living courtesy of her ample unwanted facial hair.

Removal of her sole source of income was the farthest thing from her mind. So - What caused Ivana to decide to give up her lucrative career in the circus sideshow?

She didn't actually set out to quit her job when she started thinking about her unwanted facial hair removal options. She was thinking about improving her self-esteem.

She thought about how it would feel not having to be embarrassed by her excessive facial hair. No more crowds of people laughing at her. No more jokes and insulting comments.

She ran to the circus ringmaster's office to tell him of her decision. With tears in her eyes, she cried, "I don't want to be a bearded lady any more! I want to be as beautiful on the outside as I am on the inside."

The ringmaster tried to talk her out of it by describing how painful and expensive it is to remove unwanted facial hair. "A woman only has two options," he said. "Waxing and electrolysis." Her joy quickly turned to sorrow as the ringmaster described these choices.

Waxing is the world's oldest method of unwanted facial hair removal, dating back to the days of Cleopatra. Spread some hot wax on the facial hair you want to remove and wait for it to harden. Grab a corner of the wax and rip your unwanted facial hair out by the roots.

"How's that gonna feel on your upper lip?"

"Your other option is electrolysis," he said with an evil grin. "It works on a really simple principle." Simple, yes - Painless, no.

A sharp needle is stuck into the root of a single unwanted facial hair. Removal of this hair is accomplished by an electric current that flows through the needle and zaps it.

You have to repeat this process for every individual hair.

Electrolysis may be a relatively modern development, but you have to wonder if they wouldn't have used it during the Spanish Inquisition if only electricity had been discovered by then.

Ivana left the office in a daze and wandered back to her tent. On the way, she met the trapeze lady under the big top and explained her problem.

The trapeze lady said, "There is another option he didn't tell you about."

Ivana snapped out of her depression. "Tell me, please tell me!"

"You can shave your facial hair." Ivana's joy disappeared once again. "I can't even shave my legs without getting lots of cuts and razor burn."

She continued with, "Have you seen the lion tamer's face? If a man can't even shave his unwanted facial hair safely, how can I?"

The trapeze lady calmed her down and explained what she meant. "You don't use a razor, it's not made for a woman's face." Ivana was really interested by now.

"Okay, if it's not a razor, what exactly do I shave with?" After learning what she needed to safely shave a woman's sensitive skin, Ivana started crying.

But this time, they were tears of joy.

That was Monday. By Tuesday, Ivana was happily unemployed.

You don't have to lose your job to gain the self-esteem and social acceptance that unwanted facial hair removal can bring.

You don't have to experience any pain either. All you need is a shaver that's delicate enough for a woman's face.


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  • It's tough to get rid of facial hair (The State)
    QUESTION: What is the best way to permanently remove the facial hair above my lips? I am a senior woman who has shaved for years; however, it would be wonderful to safely and permanently fix this problem. M.M., Huntsville, Ala.

 

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